09 May 2013
+ Volume Bikes NEVER fail to impress with the level of creative and interesting riding in their edits and as you may have guessed this is no exception. Definitely one to watch today and then again tomorrow.
08 May 2013
+ Newly regenerated team member, Hamish 'Hamham' Hamilton, has thrown together a quick solo session at his local park. Original and tech riding as always from Ham and a lovely teaser as to what's to come from him in the future.
04 May 2013
18 April 2013
+ No, not Hoffman this time, but Beringer! Equally as awesome in my opinion. Anyways this went online a couple of weeks ago and simply must be posted again, just incase you're an idiot who watches rubbish videos. Original, creative, rad, funny, mental, sick, sickly rad, the list goes on...
17 April 2013
+ THIS is one of the greatest things you will ever read. Everyones favourite Superstar, Disco Stu, is down in New Zealand at the moment doin it for dsab in a big way. He sent this e-mail to James at Zeal BMX Distro to update him, and us all, about some of his antics. For the love of god read on...
You know how I said that I was wanting to bone that trailer trash mum in my last email? Well I didn’t actually manage it which is a bummer cos she was dialled. She has tattoos on her tits! Tattoos of snakes and all kinds of gnar. Who gets tattoos on their tits? Only the BEST insane sluts get that stuff.
Anyway she was a mum and I was all stoked on getting so bone a mum for the first time I was super unstoked when it fell through. My buddies being the good guys they are decided to help me out and arranged this other mum for me to shag.
A couple of weeks later we are hanging out in the bedroom of this girl who knows her, drinking beers and getting rowdy as per usual. She says this new mum has just texted saying she’s almost there. She sounded desperate so I knew she wasn’t going to be a stunner, I was hoping she wasn’t going to be too fat.
I can remember vividly the moment she arrived.
Picture this; I can hear her before I see her. The room falls silent as the ground shakes from her footsteps. I look down and see ripples in my beer like that scene from Jurassic Park.
The door opens and in walks this huge behemoth of a “lady”. I’ve done fat chicks before but this is some next level shit.
She also has some sort of concave shaped face thing going on. Her face was literally inwards! You could pour cereal and milk in that thing and have breakfast out of it.
I’d have rathered it was the T-Rex from Jurassic Park.
Me and NZ Tom start flipping a coin to see who has to shag her but I decide I’m going to man up and send this whale beast.
Fast forward to the end of the end of the night and I got into a caravan bed with bowl face. I was stoked cos this was the first mum vag I was ever going to experience.
First impression: not great. You know that bit above the vag where the pubes n stuff are? Well it bulged out A LOT. It was like her vag had its own stomach. This girl is so fat even her vag has its own stomach!! It was a bit gross but kinda cool at the same time so I grabbed on to it and used it like a handle. Not many girls have a pussy handle so this whale has one up on them already!
When I put the fingers in her thing didn’t seem to have a defined entrance. On any normal vag you know when your fingers are in there because it goes past that bit that feels like an entrance. This one didn’t have that bit. It just started off wide and got narrower the further up you went. I have the mental image of an ice cream cone – but made of meat.
Anyway after a bit of mucking around I got to pillage this meat cone in the caravan. This was actually the rad part cos the whole van was swaying side to side. I don’t know if it is because she was so fat the suspension couldn’t handle the weight, or if I was just plundering away extra hard, but the cupboard doors were banging open and closed, drawers were sliding open and shut, cutlery was falling out everywhere and you could hear the water tank sloshing from side to side.
Actually that could have been her belly.
Either way it was like scoring in the middle of a hurricane and it ruled!
The weird part was when I decided to turn up the heat. We’re doing it doggy style and I show her who’s boss by grabbing her hair and pulling on it.
The next thing I know, I’m holding on to her hair – but it’s no longer on her head!
Turns out she was wearing some kind of wig/hair extensions scenario and I yanked it off! Haha! She didn’t seem to have noticed so I carried on and finished as quickly as it’s possible to while having to look at the back of Jabba the Hutt.
After I was done I handed her hair back and apologised – then immediately fell asleep. I woke up in the morning and she was gone. That’s the last I ever saw of her!'